How to gain real friends outside digital world?
What’s In? The Digital World – Now a days, people are hook up with Social Media which is one of the life in the digital world. Adults, teenagers and even young kids can interact, connect, follow and comment with each other oftentimes using some social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube etc., and they say that it is convenient to them. But the thing is, do they find real friends through social networking or they can gain real friends outside digital world?
What are the challenges ahead?
The question is ‘Why people think that having real friends outside digital world is challenging?’
One teenager said “I am so thankful to Facebook because it gives me freedom to speak what’s in my mind though others found my previous comment offending to them and they hated it, while I received positive comments to others. I think I have more friends than haters. It is more convenient to me to show what I feel rather than saying that to my physical friends”.
The Truth Is: Unfortunately, some people interact with others who they do not really know well and it is somehow became dangerous to them. The social media can be a possibly downfall to them and it leads them being bullied, humiliated or publicly shamed and got depressed.
Texting, social networking, and other social media on the other hand have been promising to gain connections to well-known people, artists, bosses, and even with your ultimate crush. However, despite of having meaningful conversations, it have been replaced by rapid-fire comments and tweets. Also, most people especially teenagers can compare themselves to one another and it can lead to false intimacy and they are focus on creating fantasy.
How to Find Real Friends even ‘offline’
What is a Real Friend? Real friend is define by bible quote “stick closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24). Can you find real friends even if you are offline? The answer is- Yes. When you want a good friendship you need to establish priorities to have it. Think of common values than having similar interests. When you are online, you always based on the other interests such as hobby or what movies they like. But, if your real friends make you a better person that’s the time you can say they are worth to keep.
You may also want to try setting list of what kind of friends you will have. Let us say, example you write down qualities that you bring you to a friendship. It maybe 3 to 5 qualities that you want to see and feel with them but, be realistic too. Not every person is going to be your best friend forever. But you will find people who are really care about you. Meet people and have face-to-face conversation so you can observe the voice tone, facial expression, and body language.
Ana, the teenager who mentioned earlier said “ I thought having a hundreds of followers will make me feel better. But the reality makes me feel realized that I am wrong!”
She added, “I was sick for about two weeks and was offline”. I realized that nobody in my social networking friends contacted me to ask what happened. But, I am so thankful that I have true friends physically outside social media. They care for me when I got in trouble. And so now, we see each other more often, hang outs with them. Mostly they help me to become more productive and be better person. I think I will keep them for decades.”
The bottom line here is:
Fake friends are easy to come but real friendship involve more than just keeping in touch. It requires that you and your friend display love, empathy, patience, and forgiveness. Those qualities ultimately make a friendship rewarding. But they are difficult to display when you only talk online.